by Peggy Burns, M.S., LMFT – CCC San Francisco, Center Director
Marriage is full of hidden treasures. If you become a treasure hunter you will see that the person you married, even in the midst of their flaws, also has high value and beauty.
3 WAYS TO FIND TREASURE IN YOUR SPOUSE
- Have a vision
When I lived in the Philippines treasure hunters came from around the globe in hopes to find ‘Yamashita’s Gold’. They spent their life savings as they had a vision of bars of gold and other treasures that had been stolen during the war. These treasure hunters had detailed maps and had high hopes these maps would lead them to treasure. Like a persistent treasure hunter, believe your spouse has infinite and unconditional worth. “You shall be a crown of beauty in the hand of the Lord, and a royal diadem in the hand of your God.” Isaiah 62:3 Be assured that what is happening externally in their lives does not diminish or add worth to who they are.
- See and treasure the high value deposited in your spouse
Value your marriage as one containing high worth. Cherish and protect it like you would a precious gem. Give it the time it deserves. Daily appreciate your spouse by telling them how important they are to you.
- Avoid the negative trap
Avoid seeing only the negative in your spouse and disqualifying the positive. Catch your spouse doing something right and tell them so.
“The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and covered up. Then in his joy he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field. Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant in search of fine pearls, who, on finding one pearl of great value, went and sold all that he had and bought it.” Matthew 13:44-45
My husband and I have been married for over 17 years now. We have learned through times of difficulties to be less selfish and more loving. We have committed all of our resources to having a successful marriage. We affirm each other daily and reap the rewards of happiness and fulfillment that money cannot buy.
Book Recommendation: Love & Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs
Disclaimer: This article is intended as an educational resource only, and is not intended to be a replacement for treatment. For evaluation and treatment, please contact a qualified mental health professional.